Adjusting Focus

Lately, it seems as though the little struggles in life are starting to pile up. I think I fully came to this realization last week, when nothing seemed to be going right, and I was more stressed than I felt I could handle. Today I've come to another realization about a solution I didn't fully see was right in front of me. When called as the new Young Women's ward pianist, I fought the urge not to laugh. With a smile I said, "Yeah. I can do that." On the outside I probably appeared to be somewhat confident, maybe even a little bit excited. On the inside all I felt was anxiety, and a little bit of humor on top of that. Still, I felt that perhaps having our household filled with hymns would be nice. I had read and heard stories about people getting called to play the piano for their ward or quorum when they didn't know how to. To me, they all seemed like stories, and things that I thought would be rather funny if they happened to me, but never actually saw th...

Eighteen years and two days ago, in a land far, far away (Guatemala), in a city, on a sunny day (I assume), I was born. Eighteen years and two days later, I'm sitting at my kitchen table reflecting on my short life. I find it amazing that somehow I've managed to make it this far, because when I was born, I didn't even have a real family, or a place to call home. For eight months I was floating around with some families, until my real one came along and adopted me. As a young kid, I was pretty horrible. I screamed, I slammed doors, I kicked walls, I punched and hit and scratched, I cried. I broke my glasses on multiple occasions out of anger. I was filled with anger and sadness. I couldn't put my feelings into words, and if I could, I would never say them out loud. When I wasn't angry, I was silent. There were times when I was fine to be around, but honestly, I don't remember too many of those times. For the majority of my life I was just confused and depres...

Yesterday I started my final semester at MWCC. It's kind of a weird feeling to think I'm so close to the end. To be quite honest it freaks me out that I've somehow made it to this point. I feel like I haven't been a part of the program for that long. It's like just yesterday I was sitting in my first class for the first time. Now I'm an (almost) experienced college student. By May 18th I'll be graduated from college! Already I feel kind of overwhelmed, though. There's a lot of paper writing, reading, and in my Human Growth and Development class, 65% of my grade comes from the four tests I'll be taking throughout the semester. I'm really hoping I do well on all four of those tests because even if I do great on the papers I have to write, that 35% will only help me get so far. It all just feels like a lot right now. I keep on telling myself I'll be okay. I've done a lot of hard, challenging things in my life. So when I start to freak out a...

My motto for 2015.  This year has been an interesting one! So, here is a quick review of what has happened over the past 12 months of my oh-so interesting life. JANUARY: I started my second semester at MWCC, taking classes that were more relevant to my major. FEBRUARY: I turned 17 and got asked to church prom, on the same night in which I had a surprise birthday party! MARCH: I went to Michigan with my mom to visit my brother and sister-in-law. APRIL: Prom month once again. Cherish and I got ready together which was really fun. Here are some pictures below. prom 2k15 MAY: Finally finished my second semester of college/my junior year. I also ran my first 5k! I figured my next step would be a 10k, but so far I've never run further than 6.5 miles. And that was once. And then I took a two month long break on running. So, there's that. Cherish left which was sad, and I became an only child once again. But I am grateful for the internet and text messaging. And Snapc...

Umm, technically it's "The End Part 4", but I failed to write a post when my summer semester finished. I only took 3 classes, and 2 were online, but it still sort of counts. But since I didn't write a post, here we are. I am glad to announce that I have finished my 4th semester at MWCC. I only have one left before I graduate, which is kind of terrifying and exciting all at once. It's hard to believe that I'll be done with high school and two years of college. A year ago I was just finishing up my first semester... and that thought makes me slightly uncomfortable. At this point I had barely decided what I was going to do with the rest of my college career. Nursing, or human services? In the end, I know I made the right choice for me. All of the classes I have taken related to my major have continued to confirm to me that I am doing the right thing. I know I'm where I'm supposed to be. My college applications have finished, which is a huge relief. ...

Tonight I had the opportunity to speak at the Interfaith Thanksgiving Service with the churches of Littleton. It was really nice and I enjoyed hearing others speak. Although kind of nerve wracking, I was glad I had the opportunity to give a small talk. I've decided to post it up here for others who weren't there, or perhaps missed some things with my habit of talking too fast in front of large groups (I apologize). You'll find it down below. Tonight I would like to start with a quote by President Gordon B. Hinckley, prophet of the LDS church, who once said, “When you walk with gratitude, you do not walk with arrogance and conceit and egotism, you walk with a spirit of thanksgiving that is becoming to you and will bless your lives.” I like this quote because it's very true. Gratitude enables us to focus on all that is good, instead of all that is bad. It is not prideful and believing you are better. It is thanking the Lord and being humble. People enjoy being around ...

home. This Saturday marks the last day in my home of 15 years. It's a weird thing to think about. I'm not even quite sure it's really hit me yet, even though my room is practically empty and basically everything in our house is in boxes. My room echoes, our living room is piled with boxes and furniture, our driveway has two huge PODs in the middle of it. Moving is a weird thing. I had to pick out clothes that I would wear for the last week and pack the rest away, and let me tell you, I was not prepared. I picked out clothes I would wear, but I only saved one sweatshirt, which I regret. Since the colder weather has come, I've been living in sweatshirts, so the other day I went tripping over boxes and using my phone as a flashlight to find that one box that had all of my sweaters/sweatshirts. It was almost worth it. Also, the emptiness of everything is kinda weird. But, spacious. Like I said, I've lived in my home for 15 years. While I've certainly had many ...