The theme of my blog this year, my motto, is "Bloom." This year is to help me figure out what the heck my life means post-mission. As the middle of the year is here, I'm coming to understand a lot more about myself, about what I believe, and what I want to do with all of that. For my group therapy practice class, we were asked to do something that makes us uncomfortable. The origin for this post mostly came out of anger and frustration, but after really thinking about it, I thought about the importance of this. And sometimes sharing these thoughts on this issue or sharing what I really honestly believe is an uncomfortable thought for me. I don't like making other people uncomfortable. I hate confrontation. But like I said, when I took a step back, I realized that I couldn't sit back anymore. Similar to a post I wrote over 3 years ago, I want to share my thoughts about race and respecting differences in others. I urge you to continue reading with an open mind and to share your thoughts on this too.
The other week I heard a generalized comment about brown people. Actually, I hear that almost every day. I've almost become numb to it. It's become a part of my life. And on the occasion I decide to actually say something about it, I hear this response, without fail, every single time; "Well, you're like the whitest brown person I know." So, what? Am I supposed to let you just say things like that because I'm not really "brown"? Does that give you permission to stereotype my heritage? It dismisses where I come from, who I am. I wear my Latina/Guatemalan label with pride. I love my skin. So just because I fit into the stereotypical "white culture", doesn't mean I'm going to let say things like that. It's not an excuse. And don't use me as one either.
My experience as a Latina has been diminished quite often. I've been told I don't know what it's like to be told racist things. I've been told that because I'm not black, I can't talk about race (by a white person). I've been told because I'm the "whitest Hispanic they know" I can't possibly understand what it's like to be seen as different. When I try to explain myself they tell me my experience is different because of my white family and where I grew up. It's frustrating to be shot down. It's frustrating to not be heard. So I'm writing to you today to tell you to see me and anyone who differs from you, as a human being. I've sat in the background of too many conversations that talk about how people different than the mainstream aren't as good as the majority. People think they're right and those who view the situation as different are wrong.
I'm not perfect by any means. For a long time in my own mind people who were different than me were odd. I didn't get it. The older I get, the more I realize we're all just people- imperfect, struggling, trying people. All of us in some way are judged. We're judged on religious affiliations, political views, our skin color, everything. But why? Where does it say we have to be the exact same? That if we think differently we're wrong? It can be easy to look on the surface, to judge by what we see. People are complex, though. Unique. We need to understand. We need to stop putting ourselves above others who are different than us. We have to listen without jumping to conclusions and value other people's experiences.
I'm taking a diverse clients course where part of our learning experience is to focus on our biases, where they come from, and how we can change them. I've learned a lot about myself and as someone who has always believed they were inclusive and accepting, I've learned there are subtle ways I view people as slightly less than I am. But it comes from a misunderstanding and lack of knowledge. So how do I change that? Learn, listen, understand. Take action. See the world through someone else's eyes. In doing so it doesn't necessarily mean we agree. For example, there was a comment made about the Black Lives Matter movement and how at first many people get defensive, thinking, "Well what about police officers? What about white people?" This student went on to say that in doing that, the experience of black people who do face police brutality is dismissed. Of course "all lives matter" but we need to take a moment to listen and not be so quick to dismiss. In my personal opinion, if we dismiss, we say the other person or perspective is less than ours.
I am Latina. I come from a white-Irish family. I've grown up in Massachusetts and I've been given more than I deserve. I have different experiences and views on a lot of things. The post I wrote 3 years ago describes some of my experiences of being Latina in an environment that is mostly white. It's a little wordy, but if you're interested, please read. Come to understand my "white Latina" title I've been given.
Overall, just start to understand other people.
As always, thank you for reading!
---Maggie
The other week I heard a generalized comment about brown people. Actually, I hear that almost every day. I've almost become numb to it. It's become a part of my life. And on the occasion I decide to actually say something about it, I hear this response, without fail, every single time; "Well, you're like the whitest brown person I know." So, what? Am I supposed to let you just say things like that because I'm not really "brown"? Does that give you permission to stereotype my heritage? It dismisses where I come from, who I am. I wear my Latina/Guatemalan label with pride. I love my skin. So just because I fit into the stereotypical "white culture", doesn't mean I'm going to let say things like that. It's not an excuse. And don't use me as one either.
My experience as a Latina has been diminished quite often. I've been told I don't know what it's like to be told racist things. I've been told that because I'm not black, I can't talk about race (by a white person). I've been told because I'm the "whitest Hispanic they know" I can't possibly understand what it's like to be seen as different. When I try to explain myself they tell me my experience is different because of my white family and where I grew up. It's frustrating to be shot down. It's frustrating to not be heard. So I'm writing to you today to tell you to see me and anyone who differs from you, as a human being. I've sat in the background of too many conversations that talk about how people different than the mainstream aren't as good as the majority. People think they're right and those who view the situation as different are wrong.
I'm not perfect by any means. For a long time in my own mind people who were different than me were odd. I didn't get it. The older I get, the more I realize we're all just people- imperfect, struggling, trying people. All of us in some way are judged. We're judged on religious affiliations, political views, our skin color, everything. But why? Where does it say we have to be the exact same? That if we think differently we're wrong? It can be easy to look on the surface, to judge by what we see. People are complex, though. Unique. We need to understand. We need to stop putting ourselves above others who are different than us. We have to listen without jumping to conclusions and value other people's experiences.
I'm taking a diverse clients course where part of our learning experience is to focus on our biases, where they come from, and how we can change them. I've learned a lot about myself and as someone who has always believed they were inclusive and accepting, I've learned there are subtle ways I view people as slightly less than I am. But it comes from a misunderstanding and lack of knowledge. So how do I change that? Learn, listen, understand. Take action. See the world through someone else's eyes. In doing so it doesn't necessarily mean we agree. For example, there was a comment made about the Black Lives Matter movement and how at first many people get defensive, thinking, "Well what about police officers? What about white people?" This student went on to say that in doing that, the experience of black people who do face police brutality is dismissed. Of course "all lives matter" but we need to take a moment to listen and not be so quick to dismiss. In my personal opinion, if we dismiss, we say the other person or perspective is less than ours.I am Latina. I come from a white-Irish family. I've grown up in Massachusetts and I've been given more than I deserve. I have different experiences and views on a lot of things. The post I wrote 3 years ago describes some of my experiences of being Latina in an environment that is mostly white. It's a little wordy, but if you're interested, please read. Come to understand my "white Latina" title I've been given.
Overall, just start to understand other people.
As always, thank you for reading!
---Maggie
Don't ever let anyone diminish your perspective or your experience. Your identity is all the things you are and everywhere you've been. If you ever need someone to back you up, I'm always in your corner. ;-)
ReplyDelete-Bella
Thank you for your thoughts!! I appreciate someone being there!
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